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MORAL DILEMMA - Help me do the right thing.

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December 4, 2013 at 6:18 p.m.

vickie

After all I know about unscrupulous contractors I just got burned bad. Or rather I got my sister burned on my advice. I haven't slept right in two months.

Just found out that his 'partner' he shares an office with doesn't share an office and didn't know he was using his license. 3 months later the job is a total mess, so many lies and he got 10K. She will have to live with the bad job as she has no money to re-do. I am sick about it, we can make it liveable but it will never be right. I have been there for the last 3 days meeting with contractors to try and get her back in her kitchen and house.

Dilemma: I want to go after this guy - BAD! I want to turn him in to the contractors license board for unlicensed activity, using someone else's license, small claims court, etc. We've got plenty of documentation and I just got his home address. I joined Angie's list and can paste his name all over the internet so his next victim can see. I have the ability to rain a poop-storm on his head to make other bad guys shiver.

Seriously, I keep thinking WWJD. After all didn't he get angry at the priests in the temple and turn over their tables?

I know that vengeance will just poison me but I am so filled with frustration. My husband warned against doing something that would ultimately hurt me. On the way home I just burst into tears when I think of the one chair in front of the TV in the empty living room with the F'd-up "new" tile floor, with no kitchen for 4-months. Worst part is this is all my fault. I was supposed to be helping her.

That piece of crap contractor told her he would do a good job because he was afraid of me.

So, how sorry should I make him?

December 7, 2013 at 1:17 a.m.

egg

Looking back on it from the vantage point we have now, it is pretty clear that the Mycenaeans were pretty much meatheads and thugs, bearing little resemblance to the handsome vision we nurture of the golden age of Athens which was a different thing altogether. I try not to feed their kind of behavior in my own life dramas, tempting though it can be.

I think I'd ask my sister what she would like me to do now. The money is less important than her mental health is. In the meantime, assuming she asked me to, or at least authorized me to, I would do the license board dance. You don't have to go to court for that. They'll take care of that for you. The second offense, if there is one, will be a lot more serious for him than this one. So at least get this one documented.

$1000 or 10% of project, whichever is less. That's all you can ever be asked to front. If a man can't get the job off the ground without being bankrolled in advance, go pick out and pay for the materials yourself. When he's tired of goofing around as a handyman, maybe he can step up and make of himself a contractor. I hate guys like that. Brings out the Agamemnon in me.

December 6, 2013 at 3:09 p.m.

CIAK

In Greek mythology, Orestes was the prince who avenged the murder of his father, King Agamemnon of Mycenae, by killing his own mother, Clytemnestra. Orestes' sisters Iphigenia and Electra play important roles in his story. A number of ancient writers and artists, including Greek playwrights Aeschylus and Euripides, have been inspired by the myth of Orestes.

Orestes was still a child when Agamemnon sailed off to fight in the Trojan War*. While the king was away, Clytemnestra took a lover, Aegisthus. She may have been driven to infidelity by a desire for revenge. To obtain favorable winds to carry his ships to Troy, Agamemnon had sacrificed their young daughter Iphigenia to the goddess Artemis*.

When Agamemnon returned to Mycenae at the end of the war, he was murdered by his wife and her lover. Aegisthus seized the throne. Electra feared that her young brother Orestes, the true heir to the throne, might be in danger, and she took him to stay with their father's old friend King Strophius of Phocis. Strophius raised Orestes with his own son Pylades, and the two boys became close friends.

oracle priest or priestess or other creature through whom a god is believed to speak; also the location (such as a shrine) where such words are spoken

When he grew up, Orestes visited Delphi* and asked the oracle of Apollo* what he should do to avenge his father's murder. The oracle replied that Orestes must kill his mother and her lover. So Orestes and his friend Pylades went to Mycenae disguised as messengers, and they met secretly with Electra to plan the murders. Then with the help of Electra and Pylades, Orestes killed Aegisthus and Clytemnestra, despite her pleas that a son should not kill his own mother.

There are various versions of what happened next. In some accounts, Orestes received praise for avenging his father's murder. In others, the crime of matricide—the murder of one's mother—was seen as a great sin that deserved great punishment. In these stories, Orestes was pursued relentlessly by the Furies, female spirits of justice and vengeance who drove men mad.

In the version of the story told by Aeschylus, Orestes sought refuge from the Furies at Delphi, home of the oracle that had ordered him to avenge his father's death. Through the oracle, Apollo instructed Orestes to go to Athens and present his case to the Areopagus, an ancient court of elders. During the trial that followed, Orestes received the support of Apollo as well as that of the goddess Athena*, who cast the deciding vote in his favor. The angry Furies were eventually calmed, and they stopped pursuing Orestes.

In another version of Orestes' story, told by the Greek playwright Euripides, the verdict of the Areopagus did not soothe the Furies. Apollo told Orestes that he could put an end to their torment if he went to Tauris, a land of dangerous barbarians, and recovered a sacred statue of Artemis. Orestes and Pylades journeyed to Tauris but were captured by the barbarians. They were brought before the head priestess, who happened to be Orestes' sister Iphigenia. Iphigenia had been rescued from the sacrifice at Aulis before the Trojan War. She helped Orestes and Pylades escape with the statue, and she returned with them .

December 6, 2013 at 7:53 a.m.

GSD

Vickie, I've had a few customers in the same situation. Some of them hired a lawyer to do all the "dirty" work and prosecute. Others had their homeowners insurance cover the cost of repairs. Others slowly paid for it themselves and got everything back to normal in a few months.

I personally would take the lawyer route, yes it will cost alittle more money but my time is money, and the lawyer knows all the paths to take and how to make them hurt !!

Good luck.

December 6, 2013 at 2:19 a.m.

OLE Willie

I had a lady call me yesterday stating that she had a roof leak in the living room so she called a roofing contractor who came over there and informed her that she needs to have the entire roof replaced right away but she said that she wanted to get a second opinion because she got a bad vibe from the guy. She had ran across one of my advertisements online that gives my qualifications.

So I go over there today and the first thing I notice is that this roof appears to be about 10 yrs old ( was a 25 yr shingle ) and was in pretty good condition overall. Directly above the spot on her ceiling was a single roofing nail poking through the shingles. That was ALL that was wrong.

I charged only a very minimal fee for the repair but I do believe that I gained a lot there today. The last time something like this happened the home owner ended up referring me to SIX more people ALL of which hired and paid the normal pricing.

December 5, 2013 at 10:35 p.m.

vickie

The best thing I could do right now is wait and let the emotions die down and the good sense rise up. It means the world to me that you will all give me such good food for thought. It's nice to talk to contractors you can still trust.

December 5, 2013 at 7:25 p.m.

TomB

I agree Mike.....I've let a lot of money go as well, trying to stay focused on the big pic, (so-to-speak).

I did run across a quote today that caught my attention - I'll recant in part ".....Please remember that money is only a tool that can take you wherever you need to go, but can never replace you, as the driving force....."

December 5, 2013 at 7:00 p.m.

Mike H

Since this turned into a religious discussion, keep in mind that scripture also says we should work out our differences between ourselves and not sue our brothers.... or owe any man money, or... and list goes on, and on and on...

We tend to pull out those verses that suit our need at any given moment. I've had a lot of opportunities to sue people. Could have sent one to prison, but in the end the only people really damaged by that action would have been his family, and decided to let time reveal the truth. Which it did.

I don't see much of a problem with reporting this guy to the authorities charged with enforcing such things, so that the next consumer is spared this agony. But as for the money... sometimes it's best for our own good sleep if we just lick our wounds and walk away wiser. He'll get his just reward in the end.

December 5, 2013 at 3:58 p.m.

vickie

Ole Willie - good call. I was thinking that Jesus got mad so I was trying to justify me being mad. I didn't think about why Jesus was mad! I am now embarrassed by my comparison.

This guy has been hanging in my contractors circles for years. He is best friends with my roofer neighbor a few doors down. He has been in my backyard for a beer many times. He built my beautiful wood patio and is friends with the guy that did all the concrete & brick work. Of course now I know why he made me pull the permit for the patio (he had no license). He had an excellent reputation for good work. That's why I didn't follow the rules. My sister thought I was his friend so she gave him the money to get all "the stuff ordered". He didn't ask for the money when I was around.

I initially called him to find out if he had a good drywall guy and he said "Me and my partner do restoration work now". My sister had a broken pipe and had water damage.

This entire thing is so bizarre. When I opened a cabinet door that he installed the hinge broke off. The sliding glass door is installed inside out. It goes on an on. He's was acting so irrational. Demanding the rest of the money or he wouldn't finish - Who pays the entire contract when we can't even get him to show up? I gave him 2 weeks to finish and fix. He didn't finish in 3. Then flew away for the Holiday.

Wywoody: I am foolish. Shame on me all the way around.

I want to just turn him in to the Contractors License Board for unlicensed activity. My husband and sister say good riddance. I told them he probably has 5 more just like her right now with his ponzie scheme.

Thanks all for listening. I am pretty sure I need to do it anyway.

December 5, 2013 at 6:48 a.m.

OLE Willie

I'm not a religious scholar by any means but I'm fairly certain that Jesus was upset at the priests for turning the church into a place of business instead of a place of worship. I don't see how that applies to your sisters home remodel.

Turning the other cheek is an anti-violence reference. There's nothing wrong with telling the truth to others or pursuing the proper legal channels just don't hit him in the head with a Louisville Slugger!

If I ripped someone off, I would fully expect to have to suffer the consequences of my actions. If they ripped me off, I would expect them to have to do the same.

"Do unto others as you would have them do unto you."

December 4, 2013 at 7:43 p.m.

tinner666

Since you're not in the USA, but in Kali, you have even more options. It's probably illegal for a contractor sneeze in public there. Go get him legally and yes, post whereever you need to 'to protect others'. Scum like him need to pay the piper. Not only is everything he did unethical, it was illegal on many levels.

December 4, 2013 at 7:18 p.m.

TomB

I can only offer my 2 cents -

"PC" is destroying our culture.

I would have a hard time sleeping if I didn't do something....I would feel obligated to do whatever I could, to reek havoc on this guy - To do anything less would be amoral.....JMHO


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